I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Randomize