found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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