can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
