I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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