We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
