I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize