Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize