you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
