There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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