No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Randomize