the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
