I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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