I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
