Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Randomize
