Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
