i permit you to call me
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
