I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
