Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
