Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize
