you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
