I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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