Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
