yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
