: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Randomize
