lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Randomize
