Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Randomize
