i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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