your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
