Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
