My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize