so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Randomize