Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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