PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
