doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Randomize
