how can u be prego again
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize
