Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
