he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
