My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
