And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
