LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Randomize
