Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
where are my eyebrows?
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