That's intense
i barfeds in our rink
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
