i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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