is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
