You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
