I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
only you would photoshop your dick
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
