super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
