Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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