remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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