I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Randomize
