found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
